Reality Checks

Our Second Occupation – Doctor

Why is it that every Indian (esp North Indian), is a born doctor at heart. Why they are always capable of bringing out some unique obscure way of healing irrespective of whether they have never heard the disease ever. Is it something in our genes or acquire owing to peer pressure (Yes, peer pressure as no one wants to be the last one to visit the patient and not land themselves offer the already offered remedy). It made me to think as whether we are very compassionate at heart and want to stopover at the patient or not to be left a chance in offering free-fund ka advice, I think the latter.

I just got a taste of this recently when I met with an accident and got disc dislocation (L4, L5 discs to be precise, :D, not to be left a chance of genuine advise if some doctor visits this page) which helps in lower body movement.
So, I got to meet/chat/talk a lot of people who offered me different types of cure than ever thought of all the medical fraternity of India. The bigger pain is when everyone has the same questions to ask with and random advice to part with. The 4 exactly same questions I answered numerously during my 1 month if bed rest were
1) Arre Sam, kya hua… u not well, u never told me dude ? (As if the first thing you should ever do after meeting with the accident is not rush to doctor but send a sms to all the people u know about your latest misadventure)
2) Accha, how did is happened? Kiski galti thi? (May be its important to make them as part of my testimony when even i’ll file for insurance)
3) How is the pain now (It wud have been better had u r not the 100th person asking the same question)
4) What does doctor say? Tum kab acche ho jaoge?

Now as much painstakingly possible, they expect you to tell them and before you properly answer the last question, they will jump in the fray and start recollecting all those people who they think had this problem. Its like

Sam to Arora aunty: According to doctor, I will get better in …(Cutting it short)
Arora Aunty to Sam: Arre, yeh sab doctor log to pagal hote hain. My cousin’s daughter’s friend’s son has also experience the same. I advised him to go to that person for massage and eat these things. He got better in few days.

I mean does it like these people have have certification in curing all kind of ailments by their ‘home-made/dreadful looking/more dreadful tasting stuff’. The best part is you will get to know
a) New relatives/acquaintances who were never part of your world (Mummy ki chachi ki cousin ki friend Bhavna ki friend ka phone aaya hai)
b) New places which never existed on earth (Arre, shilpa aunty was telling ki there is a baba who lives in God-so-forsaken village near never-heard-before town has instant cure for this. Surprisingly why don’t our Govt. approaches these ppl for eradicating bigger nemesis like Polio, AIDS etc)
c) Never heard/seen before stuff which you have to just gulp.

So, God forbid if you ever get unwell don’t tell anyone. Even if its get leaked out, tell them you are fine now and joining office within next few hours. Else …..

# posted by Sam @ 4:32 PM